What’s my story?
Once upon a time there was born a girl. She was very sensitive, sweet, aware, intelligent and ready to have fun and spread the love in this world. She was excited to experience all her life had to offer, all the world had to offer, all the while, with a smile on her face and an open heart.
Her sensitivity and awareness soon showed her that many others lived with closed hearts and minds and fears that caused them all sorts of problems. She also witnessed them reacting to her in a way that seemed scary and sad and confused her as she was so young. Did they not see who they truly were? Who she truly was? Did they not see all the possibilities of their lives? She wanted to continue being her authentic self but also desired the attention and love from those surrounding her. She began to close her heart a bit, watch the world from behind fearful and watchful eyes and attempt to make some sense of all of this some how. She began to “hide”. That seemed the safe thing to do back then. She would feel nervous and unsure of herself. She shut down to feel safe.
Only a special few noticed this.
Her life continued on with this inner and outer struggle.
She desired so strongly for others to feel the joy she felt in her heart, to freely express the beauty within themselves, as she so longed for, and fully take in and see the amazing beauty offered all around us. She felt this was a big part of her purpose. How could she do this when she felt so afraid and closed off from her own true self and free expression? There were only a very few who had the open heart and clear eyes to see in this fashion. She remembers them and is grateful for them now. She later realized they became role models and examples for her to remember when the time was perfect. There were far more who continued to impose their own fears and judgements on her sense of self and how she was to see and experience herself and the world. At the time, she didn’t know that she could still be herself, regardless of what others were doing or feeling! She felt alone at times. She kept up the smiles and molded and changed herself, her words, her actions to please others, while secretly desiring to be that free, openhearted, believing little girl that still resided, though now stored away for safe keeping (as she learned to do to appease others and gain their “love”) within her.
As she got older she continued to find herself shocked and disappointed at the lack of excitement and appreciation many others lacked for themselves, others and their lives. She would get angry, nervous, anxious, disappointed again and again, hoping, dreaming, wishing that she could get back to that little girl full of confidence, freedom and joy. She developed fears and doubts about herself. She wanted to believe again that all was ok and would be ok. Her life did not reflect her true expressions and her true gifts. She felt fake and fragmented in many ways. There were pieces of that girl still able to surface and dance around a bit… However, they were monitored by the inner police that she had created to win the approval of the outside world. Her mind suffered, her heart suffered, her body suffered, her soul suffered. Would it ever be different?
How crazy it all seems to her now!
Now she is free!! She has less fears, doubts, judgements and rules. She likes and loves and accepts herself way more than ever before. She feels strong and empowered. She searched…and worked…and released…and gathered information…and used it to her benefit. She learned things that healed her, changed her, shifted her back to her true essence and able to move forward in a powerful and genuine way. She reclaimed her childlike way of looking at the world. Her love for all living things. Her joy, her belief, her open heart and courage. She let go…of all that crap that she longer felt was a support to her. No longer serving the protective benefit it once had. She let go of the distortion. She let go of the lies she had been believing about herself.
She really wants you to release those too!
She learned things…
She is thankful for all of it…
Now she can help others to see where they got lost…how the fears set in…where they left themselves behind…where they shrunk and compromised themselves…
How to be free!!!!
If she did not have these experiences and turn things around for herself…she might not know how important and wonderful and freeing that can be!! Without her unique life story, she might not know how to help others who are longing to make these changes in their lives also.
The stories of our lives can offer us meaningful and transformative messages and experiences to be used for our benefit. Thank you for reading mine! I look forward to hearing and sharing yours for your benefit.
I am living proof that it is possible to change the way you think about yourself and create the life you may have always thought is for someone else but not you. What I offer you is what has personally worked for me and my clients. I have lived through fears and doubts about my self worth and my life. I have struggled to let my true self light shine out to the world fearing judgment and rejection. I have felt alone and did not always believe there was light at the end of the tunnel!
Wishing you freedom in mind, body and soul! Julie (She)
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